tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-52779299950761930092011-07-31T16:27:14.636-07:00Thoughts of a Plains State girl who migrated west for seminary and her first call.ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.comBlogger751100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-84935839549667844432010-07-03T02:59:00.000-07:002010-07-03T03:17:19.461-07:00

[I'm finally on a computer with working internet, so I am going to type and then upload pictures in the next post]We were supposed to be at the national park today, but that got moved to Wednesday, so we are back in Kigali this morning, at the wonderful and beautiful Bloom Hotel. We were pleased to find working wireless internet and many are on computers and phones updated facebook and sending

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-66914068451460093352010-02-06T08:52:00.000-08:002010-02-06T08:57:57.247-08:00

it's my birthday today...number 42. Happy Birthday to me...and I miss my Dad. He rarely contacted me on my birthday, forgot a couple of times, and once sent me a card in April with no acknowledgment that it was two months late. It used to drive me crazy, now I just miss knowing that he's somewhere in the world, maybe remembering what day it is, or maybe not.he died less than a month ago, and I

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-55039798463184258592010-01-30T17:24:00.000-08:002010-01-30T17:27:28.757-08:00

So, I had a dentist appointment last week. Thanks to bad dental genes and grad school years without insurance, I have a significant amount of dental work that needs to be done. I started Thursday and during a cleaning, the hygienist points out a gap in my teeth I need to pay attention to. I mumble ('cause her hands and instruments are in my numb mouth) "where?"; to which she replies, "here, where

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-41829061217737645882010-01-01T13:50:00.000-08:002010-01-01T14:00:08.825-08:00

Wow, what an incredibly lazy day and a half. I spent NYE hibernating in my apartment, watching old movies on TMC. I rang in 2010, asleep and dreaming away, cozy in my bed. It's been an incredibly busy and emotional couple of months - what with maybe having my position eliminated in the next few months...or maybe not; being in mobility, but not having much happen there; being annoyed at being

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-89432278537962565312009-12-24T08:12:00.000-08:002009-12-24T08:25:05.886-08:00

So, here I am huddled on my couch enjoying a cup of coffee and West Wing reruns. I'm enjoying a few hours of "down time" before the craziness of Christmas Eve at the church. I'm kind of solo this year for Christmas. I have had many invitations to Christmas dinner tomorrow, and even an offer to spend tonight at a friend's house so I didn't have to wake up alone Christmas morning. I am most

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-59259554436567363222009-04-03T09:09:00.000-07:002009-04-03T09:18:11.514-07:00

Holy Week is almost upon us, I suspect that ordained or not, other revgal/pals calendars look a bit like mine, FULL, FULL, FULL........Jesus was great at teaching us to take time out, even in that last week, right up to Maundy Thursday he withdrew, John's gospel tells us he hid! He hid not because he was afraid, but because he knew that he needed physical, mental and spiritual strength to get

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-2577997525986858272009-02-20T10:21:00.000-08:002009-02-20T10:26:19.145-08:00

Taking a Break Friday Five. Tell us how you would spend:1. a 15 minute breakusually a short walk to the convenience store close by for a soda or a snack of some kind.2. an afternoon offhmm...sometimes - me, a book, the couch, a blanket; other times - a movie or a walk3. an unexpected free daysleeping in, running errands, cleaning, reading4. a week's vacationaha!...this one I do have coming up -

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-2442683440602597292009-02-14T15:33:00.000-08:002009-02-14T15:38:18.822-08:00

yesterday I "defended" my thesis...which sounds so combative and this wasn't. It was a good conversation with three scholars that I admire and like, so it was a good time, actually. I now have some editing to do, but it shouldn't take too long, I hope. I'm giving myself today away and tomorrow afternoon I'm going to hit the edits.Last night two friends took me out for a surprise trip to a local

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-20218840659037571582009-02-06T06:47:00.000-08:002009-02-06T07:05:04.266-08:00

A Friday Five from Songbird: In a week of wondering how various things in our family life will unfold, I found myself thinking of the way Maria comforted the Von Trapp children in one of my favorite movies. Frightened by a thunder storm, the children descend upon her, and she sings to them about her favorite things, taking their minds off the storm.So, let's encourage ourselves. Share with us

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-38331696346031829072009-02-05T07:15:00.000-08:002009-02-05T07:26:07.737-08:00

I've been seriously hibernating the last few weeks. I've been marginally in contact with some people, but I haven't talked on the phone much at all and my email inbox is full of emails awaiting response. I just haven't wanted deal with others outside of those I have to already in my daily life. I think it is in large part a response to getting my thesis to my committee (now that is done and I can

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-31784892282889951782009-01-21T05:45:00.000-08:002009-01-21T05:54:24.895-08:00

The thesis is done!...mostly. My adviser has a hard copy of the final draft. The exam copies go to the committee members Monday, Jan 26, so I will print them on Sunday. I'm hoping said adviser gets me any suggestions for major edits before then. If not, the committee will get what I've got.I have had a lot of people cheering for me and commenting that I must be relieved and excited. I'm not. I

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-10833476164539727772009-01-16T10:56:00.000-08:002009-01-16T11:06:39.676-08:00

Whether it's new friends or new loves or new employers, what are five things people should know about you?I am very direct. I say what I think and I don't play political "games" well. I tend to be the one that says, "yeah, but...", or actually names the elephant in the room. It sometimes gets me into trouble...and certainly did when I worked in Division I athletics. I have a screwy sense of humor

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-62393205955815299472009-01-15T19:37:00.000-08:002009-01-15T19:40:42.781-08:00

the retreat plan worked well! I got a lot done - some good writing, some good organizing, got my bibliography updated - it was, well, a brilliant plan. I'm now on (hopefully) brilliant plan #2...I'm at the seminary for tonight and tomorrow night and the theological library Friday and Saturday and hopefully by the end of that I'll be done-ish. "ish" because I'll want to print a hard copy Sunday

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-49741772505273213092009-01-12T15:01:00.000-08:002009-01-12T15:11:01.793-08:00

since Jan 2007 I've been working on a thesis for an MA in Liturgical Studies. Several things - temporal and existential - have delayed and derailed me at different times during this process. BUT...I'm in the home stretch!! Today, I traveled about 15 miles north of home and work to a Roman Catholic retreat center (where I apparently am the only guest)...to lock myself away and write.I put in a few

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-29028310232757878622009-01-09T11:37:00.000-08:002009-01-09T11:41:41.077-08:00

1. Scratch or mix? Buttermilk or plain?Mix...although it is embarressing to admit. I usually go for the buttermilk version.2. Pure and simple, or with additions cooked in?Both...if i add anything, it's usually bananas.3. For breakfast or for dinner?Yes. I love breakfast for dinner!4. Preferred syrup or other topping? How about the best side dish?I'm a traditionalist - Trader Joe's pure maple

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-16080154453363105042009-01-08T21:32:00.000-08:002009-01-08T21:42:36.238-08:00

So...at ALC, they have had a tradition of 1st communion in 5th grade. In fact SP told me it was in the congregation's constitution. As we've been moving forward with a process to eliminate the age requirement from communion, it was discovered it isn't actually in the constitution..anywhere. So - that makes things easier, procedurally. But...tonight we talked again about this at council...the

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-44318105324785669702009-01-07T07:52:00.000-08:002009-01-07T08:35:42.246-08:00

I've decided that I need a thesis coach...aka someone to yell at me when I'm watching TV, or playing games instead of writing. Any takers?I have my defense scheduled for Feb 13, which means I have only a few remaining weeks to get the 75 pages done and to my committee so that they have time to read it before that day (which is, yes, in fact, Friday the 13th). Hence, I need to be writing, writing,

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-58010576892620631152009-01-02T07:26:00.000-08:002009-01-02T07:35:15.852-08:00

As we look back we may come to understand how God has worked in and through us in joy and sadness. how we have grown against what may seem impossible odds. As we look forward we may do so with expectation, and we may do so with fear and trembling. As we look back and forward in New Years liminality I offer you this simple yet I hope profound Friday Five in two parts:First list five things that

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-88237186017411660982008-12-30T17:51:00.000-08:002008-12-30T18:15:27.509-08:00

A new calendar year is just around the corner, and while I am not one for making resolutions (because I generally am so bad at keeping them), I am looking ahead to what 2009 will and may bring (at least the first half of the year):a new doctor! I have finally made that appointment and will see the new doctor early in the yeara new spiritual discipline - I'm praying my way through the church

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-75128590310907172432008-12-28T14:21:00.000-08:002008-12-28T14:27:50.282-08:00

So...in between the two services this morning, I drove home to pick up Dad for the second service. When we arrived at the church, I had a message on my office phone from my dad's sister, Thelma. The sister between them in age, Greta, died unexpectedly this morning. We were able to catch Thelma on her cell phone as she and her husband were driving to Bismarck, and now we wait for her return call

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-53595192396763506802008-12-26T14:23:00.000-08:002008-12-26T14:26:46.021-08:00

It's Boxing Day! Whatever that may mean to you, I invite you on this day to simply share five things that today, December 26th, will bring for you. 1. Christmas Dinner (pushed back one day due to the chef's sheer exhaustion Christmas Day).2. Thinking about Epiphany sermon...can I use the powerpoint again? It was a hit Christmas Eve.3. Reading and relaxing4. Bagging/boxing leftovers and doing

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-74665534254660945392008-12-24T09:07:00.000-08:002008-12-24T09:18:13.807-08:00

So, I'm snuggled back in bed (I love laptops!)...considering my sermon. I'm going with a "hook" discovered just yesterday (thanks semfem!) - about seeing yourself at the manger. We often talk about seeing ourselves at the cross, but at the manger is a new idea for me. We have screens and projectors in ALC's nave, so a few weeks ago I put together a powerpoint of nativity images, from different

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-27680664559487173432008-12-20T21:30:00.000-08:002008-12-20T21:31:34.900-08:00

so...a few posts ago I posted about the plant that wouldn't die. I came into work recently to find it clearly needing water, and how did I know? what was the subtle hint? (scroll down a bit...)yep - that'll do it. even I, the worst gardener ever can't miss that. Best of all, I dump some H2O on it and in a few hours is perky and happy again. I love this plant - it makes me feel less like a

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-68816831896642460542008-12-19T07:47:00.001-08:002008-12-19T07:49:45.387-08:00

There are only five full days before Christmas Day, and whether you use them for shopping, wrapping, preaching, worshiping, singing or traveling or even wishing the whole darn thing were over last Tuesday, there's a good chance they will be busy ones.So let's make this easy, if we can: tell us five things you need to accomplish before Christmas Eve.1. write sermon2. cut more ribbons for the

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-9856060829048129062008-12-16T08:21:00.001-08:002008-12-16T08:28:31.705-08:00

I preach Christmas Eve. That's fine - I preached the same on internship. It's not the fact that a bunch of people will be there that has me wondering what to say - it's the old problem of how do I make this new? Most people come to church on Christmas Eve to sing songs, light candles and feel good about the world at least for a short time. I guess I see my challenge as breaking into that, a bit,

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-79630530920374708212008-12-14T16:41:00.000-08:002008-12-14T16:47:07.505-08:00

the young man mentioned in my previous post died this afternoon. He was at home, as he wished. His family, a hospice nurse and a Stephen minister from the family's church (who is also a family friend) were all present around his bedside. It is also his 19th birthday.I start crying when I think of this. It is just so sad, and it was such a gift for him to be home with everyone there surrounding

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-24812250524001265022008-12-13T15:29:00.000-08:002008-12-13T15:35:11.965-08:00

sometimes I wonder what God is up to in the world...if God is up to anything, even. The younger sibling of the victim of the abuse I've posted about - this 18-year old is dying. He had aplastic anemia. At the time of the trial in October, he had started chemo, and because no bone marrow donor was available, received a cord blood transplant. The bone marrow has not started done what it was

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-54174186513386021622008-12-13T13:52:00.001-08:002008-12-13T14:06:05.576-08:00

this morning began with a couple hours of laying under my down comforter, in my cozy bed, reading. Ah....bliss. Then, I was off to a sorority alumnae gathering where there was good food, good company, and much laughter around the ornament exchange (where I ended up with the coveted martini shaker and glass set...which came from Crate and Barrel, but I can't find it on the website, so I'll post a

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-58138916933208123772008-12-12T08:09:00.001-08:002008-12-12T08:22:18.716-08:00

1. What color are your beautiful eyes? Did you inherit them from or pass them on to anyone in your family? Hazel - I think my mom's were close to this color.2. What color eyes would you choose if you could change them?I wouldn't change 'em - in the right light they match my hair.3. Do you wear glasses or contacts? What kind? Like 'em or hate 'em?glasses and contacts (no, not at the same time).

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-10471631698160922362008-12-09T12:18:00.000-08:002008-12-09T12:19:03.062-08:00

Your Quirk Factor: 50%You're a pretty quirky person, but you're just normal enough to hide it.Congratulations - you've fooled other people into thinking you're just like them!How Quirky Are You?

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-51232310417850746482008-12-08T11:41:00.001-08:002008-12-08T11:44:15.686-08:00

I have no desire to be at the office today. I would much rather be on my couch with a book, or my cross stitch, or watching DVDs. We haven't seen the sun for a while, so that's probably part of it. I also had a loooonnnggg day yesterday, so that contributes; and in general, I'm just kind of tired. I don't have anything pressing on my plate, and I could work ahead, but I'm not in the mood. Let's

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-57772925696741071722008-12-05T16:42:00.000-08:002008-12-05T16:46:34.525-08:00

"Imagine a complex, multi-cultural society that annually holds an elaborate winter festival, one that lasts not simply a few days, but several weeks. This great festival celebrates the birth of the Lord and Saviour of the world, the prince of peace, a man who is divine. People mark the festival with great abundance- feasting, drinking and gift giving....." (Richard Horsley- The Liberation of

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-53690181250904541392008-12-04T15:19:00.001-08:002008-12-05T16:40:05.674-08:00

so this morning went OK - two people from the congregation showed up, and I had a long conversation with a random person. So, I count it as a success. a short time ago, in a courtroom in Kansas, the perpetrator of the sex offense that I wrote about previously was sentenced to 59 months in prison. That is 4 years, 11 months. That is a long time. As I've said, I'm glad I don't have to make that

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-44137929043503127822008-12-04T06:37:00.000-08:002008-12-04T06:46:54.461-08:00

so, I've started this new thing today. Every Thursday morning I'm going to show up at a coffee shop for a few hours in the morning and see who drops by. I've decided to read something overtly theological (or even the Bible - gasp!) and just be - say hi to people and just be present. We're posting the schedule on the congregation website, because the prime reason is to go where people are in the

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-43965119921054407992008-11-30T09:37:00.000-08:002008-11-30T09:45:58.516-08:00

Yep - happy new year - liturgically speaking, that is. Today is the first Sunday of Advent, and therefore a new liturgical year begins. I love Advent! It is my favorite liturgical season. I love the incarnational emphasis; my favorite hymn is O Come, O Come, Emmanuel; I love blue; I love the anticipation; and I hate the waiting. Not just waiting for Christmas (although at 40 years old, I don't

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-67727360499447696992008-11-25T19:27:00.000-08:002008-11-25T19:36:46.689-08:00

so, the sentencing didn't happen. Apparently over 20 people spoke to the perpetrator's character and that he had been punished "enough" with the things that had already happened to him. That took up the allotted two hours, so they convene again next Thursday afternoon and continue on. over 20 people - I'm not sure what to do with that. Did they all know what he admitted to on the stand? Did they

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-88030010052158493062008-11-24T19:51:00.001-08:002008-11-24T20:00:07.868-08:00

Tomorrow is the sentencing. I'm conflicted. I want justice to be served...but I also wonder if it hasn't been already. He'll never be a pastor in a main-line denomination. He'll be a registered sex offender. Will justice, will society, be served if he serves prison time? I don't know. He used to be a friend...a good friend (or so I thought)...and so I don't want him to be in prison. But should he

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-32141340876579871532008-11-21T13:49:00.001-08:002008-11-21T13:57:08.476-08:00

1) Do you have a food processor? Can you recommend it? Which is to say, do you actually use it?I have no food processor, and (perhaps strangely) don't really crave one2) And if so, do you use the fancy things on it? no processor to put fancy things on3) Do you use a standing mixer? Or one of the hand-held varieties?I DO have a standing mixer - but it's having an electrical issue at the moment, so

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-4413243027175701322008-11-20T18:52:00.000-08:002008-11-20T21:48:11.533-08:00

This is the plant my brother had delivered for my first day of work at LSLC. I'm generally horrible when it comes to keeping plants alive - my black (rather than green) thumb runs all the way up to my elbow - I once managed to kill a bamboo plant, for pete's sake!this thing won't die. I dump water in it a couple times a week, rotate it so it gets sun on different parts of it, and leave it alone

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-85436585504736406372008-11-17T16:33:00.000-08:002008-11-17T17:11:45.369-08:00

So, I haven't been here for a long while. There has been a lot going on, and I haven't always been sure how, or what, to share. I have now been at LSLC for 8-1/2 months. It mostly has been challenging - the system is a bit on the dysfunctional side and I'm still not certain that congregational ministry is my gig.In addition, in October I was back in Kansas for a trial. A year ago, a young woman

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-21092328332484849992008-02-10T09:11:00.000-08:002008-02-10T09:23:10.175-08:00

so, after LSLC extended me the call, I was able to accept in person at a church special event program. It was wonderful, and overwhelming and more than a little bit scary the amount of trust and affection these people have given to me simply based on my position - I say that because I haven't me most of them yet, as there are hundreds of members in this congregation. I have now moved - I'm still

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-83086105831244972512008-01-27T20:38:00.000-08:002008-01-27T20:43:38.722-08:00

So, this afternoon LSLC voted to call me as their next associate pastor! I have spoken with the call committee chair and the senior pastor and am now waiting to get the official Letter of Call. Apparently, I need to write a Letter of Acceptance - anyone know what needs to be in that?I am very excited about doing ministry in this place and working with the staff. My time so far with the

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-70774834184246860072008-01-27T10:54:00.000-08:002008-01-27T10:59:24.247-08:00

after all of the months of waiting - we're closing in on 11 - I'm close to receiving a call. Maybe as close as 90 minutes away. Today is the special congregational meeting at LSLC and I'm the topic. As I write this, they are minutes away from beginning the 2nd service of the morning and the meeting is after. Ugh. This has been the loooonnnngggest morning ever! I was up very early - mostly because

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-72641616819530190212008-01-11T17:34:00.000-08:002008-01-11T20:10:38.646-08:00

So...here I am again. Who knew I was gone so long? I hate, hate, hate New Year's Resolution time - I don't make them, when I have tried, I don't keep to them...I hate it, so I simply avoided blogging this year around that time because I felt some existential pressure to announce my resolutions, or at least have deep things to say about the past and/or the future. I have none - resolutions, deep

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-76334292430911092042007-12-17T18:44:00.000-08:002007-12-17T19:06:59.374-08:00

yesterday was my first visit to the church that is in the process of deciding whether to extend me a call...let's call it "Liturgical Season Lutheran Church" (LSLC). I went to the second of two services, (it is a 90 minute drive, so the 8:00 service held little appeal), it wasn't a typical Sunday - it was more of a choir chorale service - so I don't have a sense of their worship style, but I had

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-45055141768564303732007-12-15T13:45:00.000-08:002007-12-15T13:55:47.075-08:00

My somewhat long-ish silence does not indicate that things have been at a standstill in my life. In fact, just the opposite is true. I think a large reason that I haven't written about it is because there is quite good news to report and I didn't want to jump the gun on the reporting and "jinx" it. Silly? maybe - but also quite a real feeling.The good news is that a congregation in Northern

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-74410747586065882002007-11-23T10:00:00.000-08:002007-11-23T10:06:23.842-08:00

The RevGalPals Friday Five: 1. Did you go elsewhere for the day, or did you have visitors at your place instead? How was it? I was the lucky guest at the home of good friends.2. Main course: If it was the turkey, the whole turkey, and nothing but the turkey, was it prepared in an unusual way? Or did you throw tradition to the winds and do something different?They decided on a Spanish menu, so we

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-14250762543621676182007-11-22T11:39:00.000-08:002007-11-22T11:46:03.871-08:00

In the midst of all of this waiting, I have tried to continue to remind myself of the things that I have to be thankful for, and since today is the day, a partial list:family and friends who have been supportive, patient, encouraging and sympathetic; a place to live; work to pay for that place - and work that I enjoy, for the most part - work that is enjoyable, challenging and that provides space

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-4113161970747586792007-11-19T10:03:00.000-08:002007-11-19T13:14:55.282-08:00

The long silence in blogging isn't indicative of much, other than the fact that I haven't been sure how to talk about some of what's been happening. So, I'll do a kind of bulleted update:On the call front: I supplied at an area congregation and the call committee from the church I'm in process with made the trek to attend the service. I've supplied at this small church before, so they know me and

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-11586016299642961372007-10-27T18:16:00.000-07:002007-10-27T18:24:09.006-07:00

well, I think it went well. As a friend said, "if you showed them the best you, then that's all you can do." I think I did that...show off the best me, that is. The call committee is a group of people that seem to enjoy each other and all love their church, so it was a good time. It was pretty low pressure, which was nice, and I ended the day by spending close to an hour with the senior pastor.Oh

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-78093176875750044392007-10-20T19:02:00.000-07:002007-10-28T16:07:10.300-07:00

Jesus may be returning soon...Kansas football is on top of the Big 12 North and they are the only undefeated Big 12 team at 7-0. I remember fondly the 7-0 start of the 1995 season and the energy and enthusiasm that surrounded the program (it almost made up for all of the crud we had to put up with). There are times when I miss athletic training and there is really nothing like being part of a

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-56934258927543184302007-10-19T07:49:00.000-07:002007-10-19T08:07:48.924-07:00

One of the blogs I regularly check in at is RevGalBlogPals - the link is on the left if you want to check it out yourself. One of the things they do is a "Friday Five" and I'm giving today's version my first shot at it...so here goes.If you were a food, what would you be?Mac and Cheese (homemade)...comforting, dependable, and you know - cheesey.What is one of the most memorable meals you ever had

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-43442446452256184342007-10-18T19:44:00.000-07:002007-10-19T07:48:41.670-07:00

As previously mentioned, the bishop of my assignment synod was in town yesterday. I have been pretty angry about the apparent lack of concern expressed by the synod staff about how I am paying my bills, rent and insurance. When we spoke, his first question was, "How are you getting by?" Now, I know I was angry, and I know that I was hurt, but until he asked that question I didn't fully realize

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-74749637723832896102007-10-13T09:08:00.000-07:002007-10-13T09:25:42.599-07:00

It's an important weekend - in a weird way, I guess. For me, my name goes to a call committee today. Two other candidates are also being presented to the congregation. My skills and passions match well with what this congregation says (in their paperwork) they are looking for in an associate pastor; I would love, love, love to stay in this part of CA; but yet I'm strangely flat, emotionally

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-36398013376923832042007-10-05T16:51:00.000-07:002007-10-05T17:01:43.023-07:00

I drove northeast today to visit the area of the congregation previously mentioned...my name goes in for an associate next Saturday. I didn't get a huge "hell no" feeling, so that was good. I didn't immediately fall in love with it either, but it's a typical outlying suburb of a big city, and the area around the church seems to be older and a little more run down, but less than a mile away there

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-82760353625300128612007-09-26T15:13:00.001-07:002007-09-26T15:26:38.773-07:00

my life is like a roller coaster right now, that is. You may or may not know this fact about me...I hate roller coasters. So, Monday I was rejected by the congregation in the NW - today I got paperwork and for a congregation in CA for an associate position. The position has emphasis in youth and young adults (yay!)...and they have a youth director (double yay!) which means that I won't have be

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-54971900315589124872007-09-24T18:20:00.001-07:002007-09-24T20:38:42.389-07:00

So, the possibility of an opportunity is no longer a possibility. I'm in my usual first-day-of-rejection mode (it's sad that I know the rhythm this will follow...) I'm sad, discouraged, annoyed, frustrated, and this time I'm looking at job possibilities in the world of athletic training. I'm back to zero options (well, this remains a semi-option as I may be in the next batch of candidates if

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-30267407292889220322007-09-21T17:46:00.001-07:002007-09-21T17:51:46.875-07:00

or so a friend of mine has billed my current situation. I'm a member of a pool of candidates ("a ton" apparently) for a call as an associate in the NW. Over the next week they are culling the group down to 2-3 final candidates. I'm cautiously hopeful - and now know what it means to feel like someplace could be "my call." There's some great ministry happening in this place and I can see myself

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-9659047145186389712007-09-17T17:31:00.000-07:002007-09-17T17:49:22.837-07:00

It's actually rather astounding that I feel so busy, since not much seems to be happening.I flew to SoCal to talk to the pastor/congregation president about a week and a half ago. It was hard to really know what to think. They don't have a job description. They don't know if they want it to be a term call or an interim. No one else in the congregation knows they were talking to anyone. I think

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-19506776882167667802007-08-26T13:48:00.000-07:002007-08-29T19:15:05.304-07:00

I'm sitting in the Eugene airport, enjoying a truly fine glass of Oregon wine and reflecting......When a sign says "speed enforced by aircraft" what does that mean? I imagine fighter jets strafing speeders. Yes, violent, but I'm not sure how else the aircraft enforce the speed limit....I was talking with some women today about seminary education and how people, in particular women, can support

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-15972166779223130302007-08-23T20:42:00.000-07:002007-08-23T20:52:06.682-07:00

So - opportunities keep piling on...all temporary at this point, though. The job at the seminary that I thought was going to work out a couple of months ago has become vacant again. This time they want me to take it - with salary and benefits. The snarky part of me wants to simply say, "you had this opportunity two months ago and passed - your loss." Another part of me thinks "benefits!" I have

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-53338544348516657482007-08-22T12:17:00.000-07:002007-08-22T12:30:24.496-07:00

well...it's been a quiet few weeks on the call front, but in other parts of my life it's been lively - I've moved...again. This move was just across the parking lot of the seminary to a room in Sawyer Hall (the head lunch lady room, to those of you who know campus). I'm attempting to "girlify" the room a bit, as it's last six inhabitants (at least) have been male. It's not too bad, actually -

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-79050855661301179092007-08-04T18:46:00.000-07:002007-08-04T18:57:24.515-07:00

I'm in very Northern California tonight. I have driven US-101 north five hours to supply at a two point parish in two small towns south of Eureka. The last two hours were on winding roads through redwoods - and for about 20 miles I drove a scenic road that runs parallel to the 101. Because I had no radio reception (and no cell phone - sorry Kari!) I was listening to my iPod. As I was diving this

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-15342943785729894712007-07-27T18:46:00.000-07:002007-07-27T19:00:20.216-07:00

It's been a while since I've posted, but there isn't much new to report. I have living arrangements secured, I have two TA jobs (Christian Ed and American Lutheranism) and two part time jobs at the seminary. I am working on the health insurance issue now, and hopefully will have some temporary insurance lined up in the next week. I continue to be astounded by people's generosity and support and

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-77044699870656321572007-07-19T16:36:00.001-07:002007-07-19T16:42:52.723-07:00

I was driving in Berkeley today, running some errands of questionable importance, but they helped me avoid reading for my thesis...so it's all good. At many intersections, people were waiting for the light to change and repeatedly pushing the pedestrian light button whilst they waited. Now, maybe I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure that one push is the same as 50 pushes, and it only (for most lights)

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-81104148016928252472007-07-17T21:23:00.000-07:002007-07-17T21:31:16.301-07:00

Today I made some contacts and some progress in opening my options for call. I visited with the campus ministry deployed staff person and talked about options and what I need to do to get on their radar. I do still feel called to campus ministry, but I know that I would learn a lot in a more traditional congregational setting, so my other two contacts were also welcome. I emailed the bishops and

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-22302749625672138142007-07-16T21:27:00.001-07:002007-07-16T21:32:56.168-07:00

Sometimes when I'm in the midst of a mess it's hard to see the good. As I sit in my dorm room, where I normally can see the lights of San Francisco (tonight it's foggy!), I find myself thinking of all of the support I have received. The good wishes, the prayers, the patience to sit through another bout of me whining...I have amazing family and friends. It is true that this will all work out,

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-28701642724674508282007-07-15T17:25:00.000-07:002007-07-15T17:33:06.602-07:00

I spoke to "my" bishop on Friday. He told me that there are no congregations right now that are accepting names. There may be one in the next few weeks, although he isn't sure about their openness to a first call person. There is also the possibility of an associate position becoming available as well. He is understanding and compassionate and he certainly didn't want me to be in this position.

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-88503938320127282822007-07-12T19:01:00.000-07:002007-07-12T19:10:02.186-07:00

I had dinner with a friend tonight. When we sat at the table, she looked at me and said, "You look weary." I am...i am weary of waiting...i am weary of trying to figure out how to pay for rent and insurance and student loans...i am weary of feeling like i'm standing still...i am weary of having others pass me by on the road to employment...i am weary of not being able to focus...i am weary of

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-20165520824425581662007-07-07T12:51:00.000-07:002007-07-07T13:02:13.691-07:00

I think I should write a catchy little tune for that title...although "love hurts" is running through my head right now. As the post title indicates, St. Da Kine has released me from their call process. The other candidate they interviewed had more experience in the areas they were looking for. I had to admit, I'm not terribly disappointed, as they had many issues (and a Praise service) that I

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-85422578718542691402007-07-03T08:36:00.000-07:002007-07-03T08:40:30.524-07:00

This morning, I'm feeling much the same as I did last night. Although, I have come to a more sure understanding that this call would not be an easy first call, and if the church decides to pursue me as a candidate, I need to have a conversation with the synod office about what kind of support they will provide for me, and the congregation, if they call me. There definitely needs to be some

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-82523029821153322352007-07-02T22:06:00.000-07:002007-07-02T22:28:34.282-07:00

Tonight was the night. I talked with the call committee of St. Da Kine for about an hour. They asked about my experience in worship leadership, and planning and style of preaching. They were concerned about how I would deal with two different styles of worship so I talked a bit about how my internship site had two different services and i spent a year navigating that. They asked about my free

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-36494494102633549162007-07-01T08:10:00.000-07:002007-07-01T08:17:26.083-07:00

Today I officially check out of my apartment and turn in my keys. I've been living in the dorm for a few days now and it's not so bad, I guess. There are only four of us living here this summer and some guests coming and going so it's much quieter than the last time I lived here. Also, this time around there is WiFi access which makes life much more enjoyable - being able to use the internet in

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-14083819687606393722007-06-27T07:20:00.000-07:002007-06-27T07:28:14.483-07:00

I'm packing up my apartment. Today my storage cube arrives and I begin the process of loading most of my stuff in it for an undetermined amount of time. It's been an interesting process this time around. I will not have access to the storage cube after it goes to the storage yard, so I have had to decide what I can live without for the next.....well, however long it takes to get a job and a home.

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5277929995076193009.post-62705393913534089432007-06-23T19:37:00.000-07:002007-06-23T19:58:29.483-07:00

[the build-up to this post is on my livejournal blog - I'm moving over here to ditch the ads and have more fun with the layout. If you want to read what came before check out http://ktjhawk.livejournal.com/]I'm in a call process with a congregation - which I'm calling "St. Da Kine." They are starting with a phone interview - ick. "Ick" because so much communication happens non-verbally and I'll

ktjhawkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05141576649848654482noreply@blogger.com1